I hope everyone had a really lovely Christmas season. Our Christmas was nothing out of the ordinary, but it was just full of sweet moments. At one point on Christmas day, I thought to myself, "I wish this could just last forever. Or that at least my kids could take twice as long to grow up as they are." Because seriously, it seems like I must have ordered the fast-growing variety of kid by accident.
Now, I know that it's not a realistic thing to wish for, but it got me thinking about what I could change that might help. And that made me start thinking about New Year's Resolutions. So here are my Christmas wishes and New Year's Resolutions, mostly for my own benefit, but I thought they might give others food for thought as well. (This got a little long, but I hope you make it to the last one -- my feelings won't be hurt if you just scroll to the end :oD )
I wish my kids could take twice as long to grow up as they are.
But for some reason, despite their many amazing qualities, they don't seem to be able to defy the laws of time and space. And so...
I resolve to be more present in their lives and to make the most of the time I have with them. I want to spend more time being really with them, and not just around them.
I wish I could be perfectly Christlike and perfectly in tune with the Spirit.
But that's not likely to happen in the next 12 million years or so. (Give me time, though, I'm getting there...) And so...
I resolve to be more aware of the needs around me, and to follow the impulses I have to do good. Sometimes I think, "Oh, I should call this person," or "I bet that person would appreciate a visit," but then I allow everything else to get in the way until it's 11 p.m. and a little late to be calling or visiting (or whatever). I am going to try to be better at acting on those impressions when I have them.
I wish I was perfect at reading my scriptures and going to the temple and doing all those good things God asks us to do.
But this one much too often goes about like the one above, with good intentions being overwhelmed by the mundane until the chance has passed me by. And so...
I resolve to devote some time to my own spirituality each day, to be consistent in nourishing my own soul with the good word of God. I also want to commit to going to the temple once a month, because I know that I need it.
I wish I was a super healthy eater and was always in control of my food intake, and that my kids could see from my example the joy of taking care of your body.
But I'm not there yet. I am definitely making progress -- in 2010 I really discovered a love of exercise, and I'm also working on my relationship with food -- but it's still a long row to hoe. And sometimes I let my kids eat way more junk than is good for them. Then I sometimes freak out that they are going to grow up with the same messed up relationship with food that I have struggled with, so I get too extreme with the no-treats. Not awesome. And so...
I resolve to continue working on my food issues. I will treat my body with respect and love by exercising and by feeding it good healthy food, yes, but also not depriving myself of the occasional treat. I will model that respect and love for my children in word and deed.
Just one more... I wish I could stick to all these resolutions perfectly.
But I already know that's just not possible. Don't we all know that when we set these New Year's Resolutions? And so...
I resolve to not beat myself up over my weaknesses, my inconsistencies, my bad days, my slip-ups. I won't let one "failure" make me fall off the wagon entirely. I know that I am imperfect, but I also know that I will never stop trying to be the best I can be, for myself and my family and all the people I love. I will keep these resolutions as a goal to strive for to help me become the person I want to be, but I won't despair over not being there yet.
This year, just like this life, is a work-in-progress. I'm sure it will be crazy and messy and happy and sad and beautiful, and I am going to find the joy in every minute of it.